Casted

I’d never had a strong desire to try casting prior to BoundCon this year. Really, it had only been over the last two weeks that I’d been curious to try it all — and even then, I only had my hands or forearms in mind.

But then my dear friend petgirl_kako was cast as a pup on Saturday and it was absolutely amazing to watch. Intense, complex, and kind of terrifying — I couldn’t imagine what it had been like for her. But it was also so amazing to watch from start to finish.

Later that night, hanging out in our hotel living room with all of our friends, she brought up the idea. They had enough fiberglass casting material to do a full body cast of someone on Sunday — and maybe I should do it. I thought about it, and then said, “Fuck it – you only live once, so yes, let’s do it!”

It was kind of a spur of the moment decision, but my ability to say yes to that experience started years ago. The thing is, I’m not particularly into casting. I don’t have a strong desire to do it again (though I probably would not turn down future opportunities). The appeal to it, as I explained to M afterward, was both the novelty and the vulnerability.

Vulnerability is the key thing. I had only been truly vulnerable with M in the past. Only within the last year have I started to really develop close kinky friends — friends I would consider family, even. Friends that I would trust enough to be truly vulnerable with. And they were all at BoundCon. And many of them were involved in the casting.

I never could have done it without that amazing group of people, both new friends and old friends alike. To do it, I had to completely trust them, and by completely trusting them, they helped me have an amazing and unique experience.

For those curious about what it was like… well, it was a lot like a completely rigid sleep sack that takes over an hour to put on, at least 15 minutes and a saw to get out of, and costs several hundred dollars for a one-time use experience. But I guarantee, it’s a very unique and intense experience.

A tremendous thank you to my kinky friends & family, including (but not limited to!), Strangehobbies and Grimly_Feendish for the casting, Serious Bondage for the opportunity, Elise Graves, jlatex, Mrs_Feendish, anne_Omalley, and especially petgirl_kako. The biggest thank you, though, goes to my partner M — he thought I was crazy for signing up for this, but was also there for the multi hour process and experience, checking in on me constantly, and taking care of me afterward.

Neck to toes body cast for Serious Bondage

Hanging out at Serious Bondage booth

jlatex, petgirl_kako, and b-kinky

Strangehobbies and b-kinky

Getting out of the body cast

Talk dirty to me

Talking dirty isn’t something I thought I’d do before meeting M. I guess I’d never really thought about it, actually. This is particularly funny because as a teenager I read my fair share of erotica, and even attempted writing some. But I suppose I thought that saying that stuff out loud would just sound funny and be awkward.

But in what was essentially the first two weeks of my relationship with M, we found ourselves apart, but texting and talking on the phone for hours at a time. M was testing the waters with his kinks — I knew he had some, but I didn’t know the details yet — and I think the four hour phone conversations at night attest to how much we enjoyed talking to each other. They also opened up the door for talking dirty.

So much of really fantastic, earth-shattering sex is mental. So much of kink is mental. And while talking dirty is a bit of an art, it’s an art that I think everyone would do well to be versed in.

Even when our night time chats turned into videos, the language we used was still critical to our experience. Sure, it was nice to see the other person dressed up and “performing”, but without the conversation it didn’t have the same meaning. And even now, nearly four years later, a few days apart is all it takes to quickly escalate to what we now call “horny talk”.

Requests to serve the master/mistress, promises to sleep in sleep sacks, schemes to wearing rubber to dinner… the language and the fantasy we build is not only fun and hot, but also really important because when reality creeps in, it’s not always possible to follow through on those elaborate discussions and plans. But I’ve learned to appreciate those words in the moment, and even more so when they are later translated to reality.

And when lucky enough to make those plans happen, it’s incredibly hot (and often evil) to repeat those words back to the bottom. “I’m just doing as you requested, slave. Aren’t you happy about that?” :)

Stripped

For the longest time, I saw crying as a personal sign of weakness. So I didn’t cry. Over the last several years, though, that’s changed. It started changing before I met M, and it’s changed even more since meeting him.

I was used to the idea of crying when I was upset, but the first time I cried in front of M, it wasn’t because I was upset. We’d just had a very heavy extended bondage session. As M started to pull gear off of me and put things away, I curled up into a ball and burst into tears. As soon as he realized what was happening, he held me and asked what was wrong.

I didn’t know. Nothing was wrong. Everything was right. It had never been more right. But as I sobbed into his chest, I couldn’t articulate that. And it was so weird.

I know I felt that M was pretty special before that, and it would be months more before I’d dare utter the L-word, but that night still marked something special. That scene touched something I didn’t know existed… that I didn’t know could exist.

M’s made me cry like that a few more times since then. If the scene is just right, and I get into the right headspace, afterward, when M starts to strip away the gear… I’ll curl up and cry. But now we both understand it a little better. And instead of being freaked out by it, I try to let myself sink into it… enjoy it, even.

It’s pretty special to have someone that can do that to you with a little (well, OK, a lot of) latex and leather.

Breaking a dry spell with rubber and SEGUFIX

Life continues to get the best of M and I, keeping us both ridiculously busy. We’ve been fitting in a bit of kink here and there, visiting shops and crafters when the opportunity arises (we recently had the opportunity to stop by Latex Nemesis, for example)… but kink has been pretty sparse in our lives lately.

Rubber and bondage are two things we both enjoy a great deal, and I’ll be the first to admit, it’s been months since we’ve been able to play with either seriously. This has made both of us just a little cranky.

This weekend we broke that dry spell, though, and M was kind enough to take photos.

B in rubber

The gas mask is a favorite of mine – it includes a heavy rubber collar on it with a buckle. The catsuit is from Libidex and is made to measure. Even more exciting, though, I got to wear my all-rubber Converse. And the absolutely cherry on top was the SEGUFIX-like leg restraints (we have waist/wrist restraints as well, but M chose to use my heavy Mr. S leather wrist restraints with rope instead). They are so comfortable, quiet, and unrelentingly firm. And you really, truly can’t escape.

Rubber sneakers

If you haven’t had the opportunity to try SEGUFIX (or a knock-off) yet, I highly recommend it. It is not cheap, but it is very much worth it.

It was really wonderful to be covered head to toe in rubber again, and something I’ve missed very much. This weekend’s fun left a big smile on my face (the two orgasms probably helped a little with that, too) — hopefully we’ll get to repeat that again soon.

My Wish List

This is a dangerous post to make because I know it’ll be used against me (I hope!). And I’ll probably get into some amount of trouble for not mentioning this post to M, and letting him discover it on his own (hi, hon!).

But, you see, M teases me about only being into kink for his sake. I don’t know if he really understands how much I enjoy it, and that while I might have been new to kink when we first met, I’d been kink-curious for awhile. I was just waiting for the right person — someone that I felt I could trust.

And really, that’s a key thing for me. Trust. You trust your partner, be they top or bottom, with not just your physical health but your mental and emotional health as well, and that is no small thing. Certainly not for me, and likely not for many people. I’m very, very, very lucky in that I can trust M in the way I do, because I honestly never thought I’d find someone like that.

But back to the topic of wish lists! :)

In no particular order, M, any of the following would make me one very happy girl…

  • A nice, long spanking session (maybe with the McHurt paddle?) accompanied by my favorite gag and my heavy Mr. S wrist restraints
  • Several hours of tight sleepsack bondage on the couch with estim and my Blackstyle gasmask with eye covers
  • Hogtied on the bed wearing my favorite spandex, rubber Converse, and a gasmask while you ignore me and continue to work on your computer next to me
  • Wrapped up in plastic wrap with a latex mask (the duct tape might be a bit much the first time…)
  • Tied to the bed, spread eagle, in a latex catsuit, rubber Dr Marten boots, rubber bondage mittens, and a gasmask
  • Some time in the vacbed with estim, perhaps with some ice cubes involved…
  • When we need the house cleaned, perhaps you could motivate me with some rubber and some orgasm denial/reward
  • A full night in the sleepsack
  • Making me lick your rubber boots clean and punishing me if I miss a spot
  • Arranging certain other discussed fantasies that I’m too shy to admit to anyone else

Please note that this list is by no means exhaustive, and more wish list items might be teased out of me under certain circumstances. These also, obviously, exclude my very long wish list of things I would love to do to you, M — but should you want me to post that list, I’d be more than happy to oblige.

xoxo

B

Shiny Boots

shiny_boots

I’ve been meaning to write about my nice shiny Dr. Marten boots for a few months now. I’ve had a pair of the rubber Drench boots in matte green for awhile, and they are awesome. Particularly as both M and I enjoy both Dr. Marten boots and rubber, we were very excited when they first became available.

Fast forward to a post-Burning Man boot cleaning incident where I thought I’d destroyed my green boots (pro pervert tip: don’t let rubber soak in water because it’ll temporarily discolor and you’ll freak out). Of course this happens before we head to Europe, where I had wanted to wear my lovely rubber boots.

In my hunt for some replacement boots, I discovered that a new version of the Drench was available – in a nice-and-shiny finish. Unfortunately, they were only available in Europe. Lucky for me, I was about to spend some time there and a friend we planned to visit was kind enough to receive them and hold onto them for me.

The boots themselves are very comfy, though potentially a bit too warm in the heat – I had previously worn my green pair to Folsom Street Festival two years ago and it was a bit much. But that makes them all the more lovely in the winter and the rain. If you’re not in the UK, good luck getting a pair of the patent finish ones… it is worth the effort, though, if you’re into shiny rubber. ;)

Sleepsacks

b-sleepsack-circuit-maskThis photo is of me from a few months ago. M had his leather sleepsack prior to introducing me to kink, so it’s sized for him – but I really like sleepsacks, and absolutely love being bound tight, so we make it work. M ties the straps as tightly as he can, and will sometimes add additional rope or chain to get it as snug as possible.

(The mask in this photo is a wonderfully nerdy Micro-Breathe Latex Enclosure Hood with laser etched circuits from Kink Engineering. We’ll try to do another post just about that mask, though.)

I think part of what I love about being bound up like that is that not only does it just feel good, but it also feels safe. Perhaps a little ironic given that it renders me helpless and under the total control of whoever has me tied up (which is just M), but it’s really amazing and feels great. And yes, I can actually fall asleep in a sleepsack (though I have yet to sleep the entire night in one, because one of us eventually dictates my early release… hopefully one day I’ll make it through the night tied up!). M has even come home on more than one occasion to find me already tucked into a sleepsack, waiting for him.

This might also help explain why I like straightjackets and also am really looking forward to M wrapping me up in plastic wrap and duct tape at some point (partly to make a sleepsack template, and partly just for the fun of it).

Travel , Vacbeds, and Gasmasks

Towards the end of last year M and I had the opportunity to visit this girl and Grimly for more than just the couple of hours our first visit with them afforded us. While in town, we visited a local fetish fair (which Locked For Infinity had a stall at), as well as had the opportunity to meet the lovely folks behind Bound in Latex. We had a really brilliant time.

I also had the opportunity to try out a vacbed for the first time. I can see why some people might not enjoy them, but personally, I absolutely loved it. It was very intense, all-encompassing, and got me into headspace pretty much instantly. The combination of latex and bondage that it provides is a real treat!

b-vacbed-vibe

While there we also had the opportunity to see some playspaces, and one thing we found particularly funny (and also were jealous of!) were the gasmask collections. M and I are up to about 6 gasmasks between the two of us after our trip to Berlin, but that’s nothing compared to the collections we saw.

boundinlatex-labeler

Also, we really appreciated the attention to detail and nerdy organization of folks… but I also suppose with that kind of collection, it’s mandatory!

Overall it was one of the most fun weekends we’ve had, just hanging out with other kinky folks and geeking out over a variety of topics (kinky and non-kinky). Hopefully we’ll have the opportunity for more weekends like that this coming year.

 

Zap!

Despite being exhausted after a long day of travel, we finally got around to testing a new toy out earlier this week when I found a horny M all ready to go in his spandex, the leather sleepsack, and a latex mask when I came to bed.

I quickly zipped him up. Digging around in our kinky travel case, I finally found what I was after: the Zap electro ball stretcher by Oxballs.

M had purchased the Zap sometime in the past month or two, along with a new set of rubber mittens (and a locking rubber penis prison, which will be reviewed soon!), from Los Angeles based Stockroom. We hadn’t had a chance to try it, however, so this seemed like the perfect opportunity to test it. I quickly wiped it clean (we had been showing it off to kinky friends during our trip) and pulled out the electro gel. M also confirmed at this time that his hands were free — something that I had to remedy with those new rubber mittens he had purchased.

Unzipping the lower part of the sleepsack encasing M, I realized he had already put two Oxballs Screwballs on — one around both his cock and balls, and the second around just his balls.

It’s important to note that the Zap is similar to 2 Screwballs stacked on top of each other, meaning it does give a nice stretch… but it also makes it more difficult to put on. Deciding to leave the Screwballs on M for now, I added both metal contacts to the toy (it can be used as a single pole as well), a liberal amount of electro gel to both it and him, and just slid the Zap down his cock. I then zipped up the sleepsack around him, but leaving him exposed.

I pulled out our 2B box and plugged him in. After a bit of a false start (problem with the cables), I finally had him beginning to moan and whimper and thrust. I eventually switched the e-stim box to my favorite mode, Training, and increased the power as much as he could stand it.

The interesting thing about the sleepsack, the Zap, and M’s thrusting is that it ended up being extra mean. The Zap would catch on the zipper of the sleepsack with each thrust, pushing it and M’s skin up and down his cock while the e-stim continued. Eventually exhaustion began to overwhelm me despite enjoying the torture session and considering my options, I added some silicone lube to the tip of his cock before wrapping my hand and mouth around him.

Now M describes the experience as “intense… both pleasurable and painful.” At the time, though, all he could do between the whimpers of pleasure was choke out “you’re so mean” and “that feels so good.”

So, despite not using the Zap exactly as originally intended, I think we’ll be using it a lot more now that we’ve given it a try. It was harder for him to get off in the end, but ultimately it seems like it was a much more intense orgasm as a result. That’s an obvious win by our measurements.

Burning Man and Exhibitionism

Last year at Burning Man, I volunteered to be the spankee for a demo in a spanking class. It ended up being an incredibly small class (of 2 others), but it was a nice easy introduction to spanking and a little exhibitionism.

This year, I once again volunteered for the spanking demo. This time the class was in the afternoon, and rather than an audience of 2, it was closer to 40. Knowing my spanker and having had him spank me the year before (and he delivers a damn fine spanking), I was actually pretty comfortable… but it definitely was a new experience for me. Who knew I’d be showing off my ass to 40 strangers?

And you know what? I liked it. It made M laugh a bit, but he was supportive and it was really great to have him as part of my after-care. He certainly benefited from it as well. And it has also spurred some interesting and fun discussions between us about possible future kinky adventures.

kinkytofu_burningman

Aside from the spanking and a quick trip to Retrofrolic for my cocksucking certification, we unfortunately didn’t see much of the kinky camps on playa this year. We usually manage at least a couple visits for parties and to see the dungeon spaces, and we specifically meant to at least make it to the FetLife Meet ‘n Greet… but, well, Burning Man happened.

That wasn’t the end of our kinky escapades on the playa, though, since we always bring a few things with us, and after the man burns we usually get up to some trouble.

M helped me put on our darlex straight jacket from Winter Fetish just outside of our trailer. He then slipped a spandex mask with built in eye mask over my head, so I couldn’t see. He then threatened to parade me in front of our camp mates and into our main camp area.

In lieu of doing more of the time consuming hard-core kinky stuff this year, since we’ve been so busy, we’ve been trying to incorporate little bits of kink here and there. One thing we’ve been doing a lot of is talking and sharing scenario ideas and fantasies. And, well, this happened to be something we’d discussed.

M’s threat was terrifying, but also kind of exciting. I begged him not to. He insisted he was going to. And meanwhile, since we were standing outside of our trailer, and not inside of it, some camp mates did see me sporting the straight jacket and hood. I still have no clue who, as M refuses to tell me.

Eventually he relented and helped me into our trailer where he proceeded to torture and tease me in numerous ways. I don’t think I’m particularly loud (M disagrees with me on this), but the right combination of things that night ensured I was very loud that night. Good thing we were at Burning Man and not at home.

It was a lovely burn night overall, and one I wouldn’t mind a repeat of in the future. Though M insists that next year he’s dragging me into the middle of camp to show me off. I don’t know about that… though hopefully we will make it to some more kinky camps and actually have a chance to enjoy some of the bondage furniture people are nice enough to bring to the desert.